February Overview

I'm not much of a wisher. Dandelions, falling stars, birthday cakes...I tend to be more of the (paraphrasing) "if you want something done, do it yourself" mindset. But I was going back through some old files recently, and this line caught my eye:

"always wishing, ever hopeful"

is a snippet from a years-old poem of mine. (1996, to be exact). It's part of the penultimate line of the poem, and it sounds so very unlike me, especially back then. But if you knew the very last words of the poem, it would make more sense:

"and still I linger, always wishing

ever hopeful, gaining nothing"

February felt a little bit like that. I am working on making changes to my personal life and my career, and for now I feel like I'm the girl who is looking up hopefully, but so far gaining nothing...or in some ways, losing nothing. 

I am now moderately drinking wine, after January's no-alcohol stint. And I find that I am drinking less of it, and wanting less of it, overall. But it still seems to have not made a whit of difference in my weight, which was one of my key reasons for abstaining. 

I'm also off all extra sugar, and that has apparently had no effect either! This I find amazingly difficult to believe. I am having no hot cider (with whipped cream) on cold days, I am having no whipped cream on anything...and I am having no candy, chocolate, licorice, frozen yogurt (which I love, and seems healthy, but is really full of sugar). And I'm still exercising regularly three times a week. Apparently I am managing to eat my way through enough calories to keep my weight the same...they're just healthier calories.

I've realized that while I do enjoy "good" food, like salmon or chicken or veggies, I really do consider sweets a treat...and I was treating myself several days a week. But apparently not enough to make a difference in my weight or clothing size? My only hope so far is that I am in the midst of a very slow weight loss that will take at least three months to happen! ~wry smile~ Apparently stronger measures are needed.

But I have noticed some changes...for one, more energy. I am not quite the exhausted soul I was for most of January. Whether that's due to the COQ10, the exercise, or the reduced amount of sugar I'm having, I don't know. But I have been feeling less pain from time to time, and am not wanting to sleep six hours a day PLUS eight or more at night...I'll call that progress.  :)

Career-wise, things are slow too. I didn't hit my January deadlines for submitting to festivals, which leaves a huge gap in my schedule. I could have filled that with...well, "filler" shows, but that's the kind of panicky thing I did last year, and it didn't work so well for me. So I did not allow myself to send in applications for shows that I feel I've outgrown. However...that means very few shows from March - May...a long time to be without my main source of income.

I spent a good portion of January and early February feeling stressed and worried about the looming months. And then I just had to let it go. I have to trust and believe that what I'm doing is what's right for me, that the path I'm on is part of the larger journey, that the Universe will provide. That's big stuff for a girl who has never trusted anyone / anything to provide for her...and pretty much still doesn't. "If you want something done..."

But I am finding that I just can't rush the progress on the jewelry. I did finally get the new items photographed and submitted to a few shows. One of them is probably quite out of my reach, the others, maybe less so...but I'm still optimistic, I suppose. So now I just have to wait see what happens with those. I won't know anything until April 1 at the earliest...all I can do is keep working, keep trying new things, keep growing my skills and also...hope for a little luck in the jurying process

Always wishing...ever hopeful.

*Also, at today's weigh-in, down two pounds from the beginning of the month. *Despite* five days in New Orleans. So it's not a big change, but I'll take it. Better than going in the other direction!  :)

The Path is Never Straight

I keep saying that I want to challenge myself. And boy...I am challenged. I've been working on fabricating the most complex piece of jewelry I've ever done, and for quite a while, it hated me as much as I hated it. We were not in love at all.

It started a bit like this piece:

But that's part of the problem: it started like the piece in the photo above. Part of the way through, the design turned into something very different, which can sometimes cause difficulties. In this case, I'd already gotten to a point where I was using easy solder. And then I made some changes and found myself a little stuck.

Next it looked like this:

See, when you're soldering silver, you have essentially three choices: hard, medium, and easy solder. (there's an extra-easy, but most people I know never use it).

Essentially all solder flows (becomes liquid) at a lower temperature than sterling silver. Each solder has a bit more alloy in it, and thus flows at a lower temperature rate:

Easy solder: flows at 1325 degrees Fahrenheit
Medium solder: flows at 1360 degrees Fahrenheit

Hard solder: flows at 1450 degrees Fahrenheit
Sterling Silver: flows at 1640 degrees Fahrenheit

Since each solder will melt / flow at a lower temperature than the silver itself, ideally this means you should always be able to flow your solder before you melt your silver! AND it also means that you have three options for complex projects. You start with hard solder, then as you keep adding embellishements or additional joins, you switch to medium, and finally easy. Thus the next step has solder flowing at a lower temperature so you (supposedly) don't unjoin what you already soldered.

Sounds...sound, right?  :)  And it is. The difficulty lies in changing your design, and having already gone up the chain to easy solder for some joins...then when you have to join something else to your piece, you run a very high risk of re-flowing your prior join. And that happened to me several times on this piece. Very, very frustrating!

But it's part of the learning process. And I learned, learned, learned. I did several new things on this piece:

- Soldered big, flat pieces to a the big, wide bar (lots and lots of heat!).

- Soldered tubing to the edges of square wire for the chain (can't let them get crooked; tubing likes to roll around). Tubing and I really don't get along (yet). It tends to have a mind of its own.

- Cut out a matching top from sheet metal for the bottom of my piece (had I planned this initally, it would have been a lot easier to match). But I really, really like the effect:

- Hand set an apatite...when I got to the stone-setting step, I realized that for this design, I'd chosen an apatite. Pretty blue stone, yes, but a 5 on the Mohs scale, and also prone to fracture. So I held my breath all the way through the stone setting proces...but it didn't crack or chip. Hurrah! 

...and this bad boy is ALL hand fabricated. The pendant, the bar chain, the extender, the clasp.  While there are some parts I would do much differently, I am now starting to fall in love with it again...

 Plus, I think I'm starting to get a handle on the finishing / polishing, so I can get the look(s) I want for the metal. You'd have to be a metalsmith to understand how important that is to us geeks...just trust me on this one. It's a happy, happy day in the studio. :)

Tucson 2013: Part III

One more post of fabulous new finds...then back to some jewelry photos next week.  :)

Freeform crazy lace agate from Guadalajara, Mexico. Remember when I posted here about wanting to challenge myself with setting more irregular stones? I found some beauties! They happen to *all* be crazy lace agate, but they're all strikingly different and beautiful. I bought directly from the cutter (this actually happened several times this year) and it was a fantastic experience.

Here's another:

A very different cut! I'm thinking of setting it just the way it's photographed - maybe with only a bezel on the top of the stone so you can see the full effect of the crystals on the bottom. Or these might be the stones that finally push me into doing some sort of prong setting. They're just as lovely on both sides and I want to expose as much of the stone as possible.

My personal favorite of the ten or so I purchased:

It's hard to see here but there's a line of open crystals across the top of this stone. And the coloring is just lovely. Here's a closer shot with the crystals on the bottom so you can see better:

That whole dark gray area on the bottom is a crystal bed. 

I have collected crazy lace agate in a small way for several years, and like many stones, it's become harder and harder to find. It comes only from Guadalajara, and the pieces I'm seeing now often don't have the lovely color that I've seen in the past. Many are simply gray and white, which is also pretty, but I love the rich colors. So coming across these was a happy surprise.

I mentioned that I bought these directly from the stone cutter. And that was wonderful.  I was fortunate enough to have that experience three different times while shopping the gem show this year. One booth was outside and had the cutting machine going in the back (the couple's son was cutting) while I browsed. These folks were great - I bought my first piece of variscite from them - and some other choice stones - and learned so much from their knowledge and experience. Then I bought these funky agate pieces from the cutter, who was so easy to work with. And the Royston pieces I posted previously were directly from the family who cuts the stones and sells them. There were two generations of cowboy cutters there (hats, big belt buckles, and boots included) and we had a blast.  :)

In the past, I have purchased from foreign dealers who manage to act like my paltry $500 (or more) purchase is barely worth their time (and I put paltry in italics because, hey! for most people, $500 is a chunk of money. I realize that for some of these dealers it's a tiny amount, but I still find it rude to treat your customers like they're not worth your time - no matter what amount they're spending). I've spent in the four figures with certain stone dealers and they just act like it's an annoyance to weigh the stones, give me a total, or write a receipt. This is not true of all foreign dealers, of course, but some of them make me feel a little dirty for doing business with them.

This year, it was such a pleasure to at least occasionally purchase from American dealers who took the time to share their knowledge with me, and to enjoy the interaction with someone who loves stones as much as they do. American-made is more expensive, no doubt about it. But it's really nice to support others who are working to create the best product they can, and to know who's doing the work and how it's being done. A very welcome bonus to my shopping this year.  :)